Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Having a purpose...

Going from being a working wife to a stay at home mom (SAHM) is a hard transition. Please don't get me wrong. I love staying at home and taking care of Ian everyday. However, I realized recently that I feel as though I have lost my sense of purpose. You see when I worked I brought home money to contribute to the bills, food, and fun. But now, I don't. Yes, I know that part of my purpose is to keep the house clean and help Ian grow into a Godly young man, but it has taken me over a year to figure out that there is much more to my new job as a SAHM.

One of things I have realized over the last few days is that helping our family save money is one of the things I can do as a SAHM. So yesterday I decided to do what I could, you know the little things. So instead of sitting in a house with lights on and blinds closed I opened the blinds and let the sun in and turned off the inside lights! It was actually really nice. I also didn't turn on the TV (except for a breif 5 minutes so I could watch the last few minutes of Friday's episode of Gilmore Girls) until 2:45! Not only did this save on electricity but it also opened up time for me to play with Ian and AJ (AJ is my friends son who I am watching for the next 10 weeks). It was really nice. I also think it may have worn Ian out which allowed him to go straight to sleep when I put him down for his nap. No fussing or anything!

With this new found sense of purpose I also felt energized to finish the laundry that had been in the basket for days and not only fold it but put it away! I cleaned the kitchen, only to have it messed up by the time Justin got home, I am not sure how that happens but it does.

I also felt good knowing that by watching AJ I am contributing to our money again! It is amazing how loosing ones purpose can affect your whole attitude. I hope that I can continue to learn what my purpose as a SAHM is.

Are you a SAHM or maybe a new wife or perhaps living the single life? What is your purpose in the stage you are in right now? I would love to hear what you have to say! Leave me a comment sharing your story with me. (you can also link up at the musing of a housewife blog)

8 comments:

JanMary said...

I found it a huge transition from working to staying at home. I know I am in the right place for both me, our kids and our marriage.

This doesn't mean though that every is easy, but it is good to know that no matter how bad a day gets, that I am where I need to be.

HaleyP said...

OH man...there are so many things I could write here! I know what you mean about wondering if your purpose is just to clean up after everyone all day and take care of everyone else. But I look at my job as a mom/wife in the way that everytime I serve my family, I am serving God. He called us to be keepers of our home and to work for Him. Also..view your time at home as your full time job. Think about when you were at work and you worked hard because your boss was there..think of God as your boss! Do your best all the time! Anyways..have a great day!!

jen@odbt said...

I agree with JanMary. It was a hard transition for me too but it was one of the best decisions we made for our family. There are definitely days when I wish for my working life or even just time alone but that's just not what's in store for me right now.

Emily B said...

Hi Jessica, I found you a Musings of A Housewife. So many times, my thoughts and emotions have mirrored your own. Beig a SAHM, as wonderful as it is, and as much as God has called you to it, can be really hard. Back in September I had to work through this (not for the first time). I ended up blogging on it. Here's the link. I hope it will be an encouragement to you.

Emily

http://life-artist-48.blogspot.com/2008/09/my-new-job-title.html

Musings of a Housewife said...

I can so relate to this. I've been a SAHM for 9 years and as much as I'm thankful for the opportunity, I've gotta tell you; it's getting OLD. The messes are never ending. I know I need to look at keeping up with the house as my purpose, but it seems more like drudgery at the moment. :-)

Thanks for the reminder that what I'm doing DOES have a purpose!

Hairline Fracture said...

I've been a SAHM since my daughter was born 6 years ago. Especially at the beginning (but also at different times along the way) I felt the same way as your description. It was also harder when my kids were babies and needed me more physically. Now that we can talk, I can see my purpose more clearly: to train & mold them to be Godly people (as you said). It WAS a big transition from wage earner to bringing in no money--but as you said, you can save your family money which is huge! We need to remember that the world doesn't tend to value non-paid work, but what we do is still work, and it's still very important. I'm sure your friend is very grateful you are able to watch AJ for her.

Bridget said...

I always wanted to stay home and never regret that decision. I remember before we had our son, I met a wife of one of my husband's old friends. They had no kids, but she "stayed home." She told me that her job was to make a happy home for her husband. I liked that. I think it helps to remember that it's not all about the kids, either. :)

Ace said...

I didn't have a hard time transitioning into SAHM, but will really have a problem transitioning back into the work world one of these days. It's really hard trying to think about what kind of job I'd want when I didn't go to college and have been home with the kids for over 8 years. I'm trying to come up with jobs that I can do from home because thinking to that part of my future really scares me.