Saturday, November 19, 2011

unrealistic expectations

As a women, I tend to have unrealistic expectations about pretty much everything! I was just talking to some friends about how when I was in high school I was "in love" with so many guys. I thought I knew what love was back then, but I just don't know how you can know what it is until you are married.

Which brings me to my subject of today. Marriage. I am realizing why people are getting divorced right and left. They have unrealistic expectations of what marriage is.

Some things they think marriage should be or provide:

1. never being lonely
2. forgetting your past hurts/heartbreaks
3. breakfast in bed and s*x all the time

Those are only a few things that I can think of. I know that so many people believe these will be true, but let me tell you people, it is not. I am married with two kids and I have days where I feel lonely. I love my husband so much and I know he loves me, but I am still hacked at the guy who just stopped calling me, I am glad we didn't end up together, but still would have preferred he ended it in a better way. I am pretty sure the only times I have had breakfast in bed were when I was on bed rest and I am not even going to address the other issue. ;)

I am so glad that Justin and I had an amazing newly wed class at our church to go to. It was what I believe helped build our foundation for a good marriage. Now will we have hard times, yes, but because of that foundation we will make it. God taught us so much in that class.

I don't want to discourage people from getting married. I think it is so great and I couldn't imagine my life with out Justin in it as my husband. I just think people need to be aware that it takes work, don't give up the first time things don't go your way, in fact don't give up the 100th time things don't go your way. If you need counseling then get it. It is important to fight for that love that you know you once had.

I hope this made sense. It sounded so good when I "typed" it up in my head, but it never comes out the same when I type it up in real life.

1 comment:

Kellie said...

Another good thing to mention is that love is more than a feeling, it's a choice. You won't always feel like you love your spouse and that is when it is important to make the decision to choose to love them. :-)